tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8648984896457286662024-03-12T18:33:20.553-07:00One Tired MamaAnonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08837162911344469993noreply@blogger.comBlogger103125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-864898489645728666.post-82578010504049173282016-02-23T14:02:00.001-08:002016-02-23T14:02:26.959-08:00I am THAT mom<div style="color: rgb(69, 69, 69); font-family: UICTFontTextStyleBody; text-decoration: -webkit-letterpress;"><br></div><div style="color: rgb(69, 69, 69); font-family: UICTFontTextStyleBody; text-decoration: -webkit-letterpress;">It's funny how when you're young and the kids are young how differently you see things. When your oldest kid is under 10, it's very easy to control the environment, what they are exposed to etc. Generally they go with the flow of what the family is doing. At this time, you can't see the future and when you try to imagine it, well it looks just like now you think. I remember when someone said to me many years ago, wow, you run a tight ship! It will be interesting when they are all teenagers! I honestly thought, uh, it will look the same! Obviously how wrong I was, but what is so interesting to me now is how focused on the wrong things we are sometimes. For example, you're in the store and see a child who you think is way too old throwing a fit. You think, glad it's not me, my kids know better, I'm raising them right. You hear stories of families where kids are lying, cheating, stealing, drinking, smoking and having sex and think, oh my kids will know better, I'm raising them right. How about the kids that don't do well in school? Don't go to college? I remember talking to a friend and she was like oh college isn't an option of course my kids will go! How about when the phone rings, it's the principal and to your utter surprise and disappointment your kid was the one in trouble! What happened to I'm raising them right? Well I'm here to tell you, I am THAT mom. You know the one, who's kids aren't doing the "right" thing. The one where it's her kids throwing the fit. The one where it's her kid that bullied yours. The one where her kid stole from you. The one where it's her kid having sex. The one where it's her kid not following the house rules. Here's what you don't know. I'm the one who looks strong, but is dying inside in the same shock and horror of what their kid just did. The one who also wonders, where did I go wrong? What does everyone else know that I don't? Why is this happening to me? The one who doesn't let her disappointment show, but is the rock her kids need. The one who cries in the shower so no one can hear. The one who doesn't know what to do sometimes. You know what THAT mom needs? Kindness, compassion, support, hearing they are a good mom, that she has great kids who made a mistake. Why do we waste so much time focused and in fear on partying? Missing curfew? What we think our kids need to be doing? Isn't being a teenager the time to make mistakes and learn from them? Isn't it better to mess up but be young enough to turn it around, with the love and support from your family? Isn't character more important? Are you honest? Responsible? Kind? Supportive? Loving? Empathetic? Do you put others above yourself? Yep my kids can be loud, obnoxious, inappropriate but let me tell you, they love each other and their family. When someone is in need, they pull together and help. Whether it's simple things like digging a garden, or supporting their sister who just had a baby. The times I'm just spent, and they all chip in, clean the house, cook dinner and let me rest. All I know is when I step back and look, I have some pretty amazing kids and I'm lucky to be THAT mom.</div><div style="color: rgb(69, 69, 69); font-family: UICTFontTextStyleBody; text-decoration: -webkit-letterpress;">~OneTiredMama</div>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08837162911344469993noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-864898489645728666.post-15836697956016856332015-11-08T09:41:00.001-08:002015-11-08T09:41:01.419-08:00The difference a year makes<div>November is always the month I start reflecting on my last year, what I'm thankful for and the direction I hope my next year goes. I'm always amazed how much change actually happens in a year!</div><div>Last year my kids were testing me and my major concern was the twins starting Kindergarten and finally having time for myself. As you know not only did they stop full day kindergarten, my 17 yr old got pregnant! So far the hardest thing for me has been letting go of the "whys"... Why now? Why can't I ever get a break? So it's been a very different year than I expected. What I've learned this year is that I've grown in ways I didn't even know I needed to. Am I still left with questions? Yep! The main one is, what am I supposed to be doing? I've been home with kids for 23 years. Just when I thought it was my time now, my daughter is having a baby! So I will still be home with a baby! Of course I'm watching the baby while she goes to school. She is on track to graduate in May, and then I will watch the baby so she can go to beauty school. What I'm learning is that being a mom is about balance. You don't always have to put your kids before yourself. It's not selfish to take care of yourself or go out without the kids! They don't have to always be a part of everything. When you take care of yourself, by doing what you want at least some of the time, you are happier which makes you a better wife, mother and person to be around. Honestly I wish I realized this years ago. I spent a lot of time and energy on things that weren't important. That's why now I've made it my mission to not only share my journey but I've made it a point to teach my girls the importance of not losing themselves. This is the first year in probably 20 that I have met my personal goals! I wanted to lose 20 pounds, I lost 22! I wanted to get healthy, I started clean eating and I'm loving it! I wanted to start working out. Not only have I lost a ton of inches, I have muscles and am in the best shape of my life at 43!! I wanted to find myself. I realized I'm right here, where I belong as the center of my family. I didn't lose my joy of mothering, I forgot to do for myself, do things I like, do things just for ME. I realized I am enough just being me even on a day I yelled too much, didn't shower or cook dinner. My self worth is not the success of my children, or how clean my house is. I have found I was given my life because I am strong enough to live it. My oldest moved back home, my son got in some serious trouble and my 17yr old daughter is pregnant, but you know what? I'm still a good mom, my kids love and respect me, and my marriage is stronger than ever! That is what I'm thankful for. </div><div>Where will 2016 take me, I have no idea! What I do know is there is joy in the journey even when it feels like hell. I also know I can handle it, and that being a mom will always be the best part of me. </div>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08837162911344469993noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-864898489645728666.post-11197227396089529842015-10-19T15:23:00.001-07:002015-10-19T15:23:10.435-07:00Motivation Monday<span style="color: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.701961); font-family: UICTFontTextStyleBody; -webkit-composition-fill-color: rgba(130, 98, 83, 0.0980392); text-decoration: -webkit-letterpress;">So let's talk motivation today</span><div style="color: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.701961); font-family: UICTFontTextStyleBody; -webkit-composition-fill-color: rgba(130, 98, 83, 0.0980392); text-decoration: -webkit-letterpress;">I find how you start your Monday sets the tone for the week. Mondays are kind of a rush day for me since our school has a half day on Monday every week! So that means my kids are home by <a href="x-apple-data-detectors://0" x-apple-data-detectors="true" x-apple-data-detectors-type="calendar-event" x-apple-data-detectors-result="0">1 o'clock</a>. I work hard at scheduling the morning so I get some housework done and my workout before the kids come home. I pretty much work out the same time every day and that really helps me to stay motivated and on track since I'm a very scheduled and routine person. I noticed most people don't share about what motivates them but I think it's really important to figure out what motivates you what keeps you motivated and how you will stay motivated. For me when I first started of course the motivation was just to feel better, to not wake up every day not feeling good, feeling tired, fat and frumpy. It was the hardest thing that I ever started. I was not in the mood I was already over 40 part of me didn't really care, I kind of saw it as just my last shot to get healthy and enjoy life before I get too old. I was fighting age, and my thyroid as well so it took me really long to start seeing results, but I stuck with it because I noticed right away how much better I felt getting off the couch doing a little work out trying to eat better. it gave me purpose, gave me direction it was something and still is something that I can control. I control myself what I do what I don't do what I eat what I don't eat. Then before you know it everything gets easier, making healthy choices, workouts clean eating... then suddenly it takes off and you start to really see the results of all your hard work. That's what keeps me motivated now the results, not only do I feel more healthy I look more healthy and I look younger which is probably the best benefit of them all, how my body looks how my body feels and the clothes that I can wear now . </div><div style="color: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.701961); font-family: UICTFontTextStyleBody; -webkit-composition-fill-color: rgba(130, 98, 83, 0.0980392); text-decoration: -webkit-letterpress;">So take some time today to really think about it and please share with me what really motivates you and how you plan to stay motivated have a great Monday.</div><div style="color: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.701961); font-family: UICTFontTextStyleBody; -webkit-composition-fill-color: rgba(130, 98, 83, 0.0980392); text-decoration: -webkit-letterpress;">Email me at onetiredmom9@gmail</div><br><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh8RM2G2SeyAUFfBTkS7mTrEebFMBfjDIL63myl_Hw8DzFQYy8HSUVKaLO7RdM1_3VDs-99q_4t07JRaxxa3yoJKDXwkXYA5VJ2aJTEnESHSbOEGoh1sqPQCgv7_0cr-ZUbiW-5pOQBRb8/s640/blogger-image-61810715.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh8RM2G2SeyAUFfBTkS7mTrEebFMBfjDIL63myl_Hw8DzFQYy8HSUVKaLO7RdM1_3VDs-99q_4t07JRaxxa3yoJKDXwkXYA5VJ2aJTEnESHSbOEGoh1sqPQCgv7_0cr-ZUbiW-5pOQBRb8/s640/blogger-image-61810715.jpg"></a></div>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08837162911344469993noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-864898489645728666.post-55810557530965239252015-10-17T09:18:00.001-07:002015-10-17T09:18:59.216-07:00Lose a turkey<span style="color: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.701961); font-family: UICTFontTextStyleBody; -webkit-composition-fill-color: rgba(130, 98, 83, 0.0980392); text-decoration: -webkit-letterpress;">How would you like to lose a turkey?</span><div style="color: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.701961); font-family: UICTFontTextStyleBody; -webkit-composition-fill-color: rgba(130, 98, 83, 0.0980392); text-decoration: -webkit-letterpress;">I'm talking about 10-15 pounds by working out, drinking Shakeolgy and clean eating. </div><div style="color: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.701961); font-family: UICTFontTextStyleBody; -webkit-composition-fill-color: rgba(130, 98, 83, 0.0980392); text-decoration: -webkit-letterpress;">Now is the time to lock good habits in place before the holiday craze of sweets and treats.</div><div style="color: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.701961); font-family: UICTFontTextStyleBody; -webkit-composition-fill-color: rgba(130, 98, 83, 0.0980392); text-decoration: -webkit-letterpress;">Starts <a href="x-apple-data-detectors://1" x-apple-data-detectors="true" x-apple-data-detectors-type="calendar-event" x-apple-data-detectors-result="1">October 26</a></div><div style="color: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.701961); font-family: UICTFontTextStyleBody; -webkit-composition-fill-color: rgba(130, 98, 83, 0.0980392); text-decoration: -webkit-letterpress;">Email me at onetiredmom9@gmail</div><br><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgNEuCGh2xdz-LH3LSj8hyphenhyphen2EoAKrZcH89SeSlTx8fXVrCz1OUmNXYWY70oSIsJ5no_r1l6G4q97omrH200mK1r9Bb-eK4eNFFA6sRqo_e8Op2s8KRlZJQcYH1iQpEconFj6rn3pLx-i7CY/s640/blogger-image-329044104.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgNEuCGh2xdz-LH3LSj8hyphenhyphen2EoAKrZcH89SeSlTx8fXVrCz1OUmNXYWY70oSIsJ5no_r1l6G4q97omrH200mK1r9Bb-eK4eNFFA6sRqo_e8Op2s8KRlZJQcYH1iQpEconFj6rn3pLx-i7CY/s640/blogger-image-329044104.jpg"></a></div>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08837162911344469993noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-864898489645728666.post-83836882630310498812015-10-12T08:02:00.001-07:002015-10-12T08:05:03.085-07:00Motivation Monday<span style="color: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.701961); font-family: UICTFontTextStyleBody; -webkit-composition-fill-color: rgba(130, 98, 83, 0.0980392); text-decoration: -webkit-letterpress;">Motivation Monday always gets me thinking. Of course our kids, family etc is our motivation for getting healthy, but I want you to think about how you are eating better and working out for YOU. What keeps me motivated when I'm tired, stressed, and having a bad day is how good I feel in my clothes, how strong my body is now from working out and how I am in control of what I do and don't do for myself. As women it's easy for us to make everyone else a priority over ourselves. When we are a priority in our own life, we feel better about ourselves which makes us happier. As a result the day to day tasks are easier to handle. The food we eat and working out directly affects our mood. Remember this is a lifestyle, it will take time. Is it hard sometimes? Yes! But it is always worth it!</span><div style="color: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.701961); font-family: UICTFontTextStyleBody; -webkit-composition-fill-color: rgba(130, 98, 83, 0.0980392); text-decoration: -webkit-letterpress;">What is your motivation for getting healthy?</div><div style="color: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.701961); font-family: UICTFontTextStyleBody; -webkit-composition-fill-color: rgba(130, 98, 83, 0.0980392); text-decoration: -webkit-letterpress;">Contact me at onetiredmom9@gmail.com</div><br><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgbrH8Yw4l2XTgogv3eU1aqSE70PAmTKHGuV-dJsgBlb_nQHe7C0R8UUZvSgo8gfL5j4NUc8vx-Z_AAlCRM3o6irbsqysTILXhy_qbzacUwmDZztGWhuAHU3QwuKmUt0bfCN0LzHyjf7s4/s640/blogger-image-389274394.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgbrH8Yw4l2XTgogv3eU1aqSE70PAmTKHGuV-dJsgBlb_nQHe7C0R8UUZvSgo8gfL5j4NUc8vx-Z_AAlCRM3o6irbsqysTILXhy_qbzacUwmDZztGWhuAHU3QwuKmUt0bfCN0LzHyjf7s4/s640/blogger-image-389274394.jpg"></a></div>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08837162911344469993noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-864898489645728666.post-72035221800014988662015-10-08T09:20:00.001-07:002015-10-08T09:20:11.858-07:00Goodbye excusesAs you can imagine when it comes to excuses I have plenty! What difference does it make if I lose weight or not? It won't change the kind of wife or mother I am. I'm in my forties, married with 7 children who cares. I'm so busy there is no way I have the time. <div>But the real problem was I didn't feel good at all. I hated going out since I didn't like how my clothes fit. I was feeling really down about myself. My confidence was at a low. I started to think about how I spend my days. The crazy thing is I have at least 15 hour days. How could I not find time to workout? Putting myself first on my list of priorities was hard, I wasn't used to it and neither was my family. I started out slow, 30 min walking, then kettlebell and then I tried the gym. For me the gym didn't work since I had to wait until someone could watch the kids. When I got there I never could figure out a routine. Oh sure I could hire a trainer but I don't have that kind of money. It was slow going until my friend told me about Beachbody. The combination of working out, drinking shakeolgy and clean eating worked right away. I saw results in the first month and it kept me motivated. It didn't take long before I felt good physically and mentally. This is a lifestyle not a diet. After a few months my husband started doing it and now the whole family works out and eats clean. </div><div>You can join me on this health and wellness journey! Email me at onetiredmom9@gmail and we can get you started 😀</div><br><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi7Tts78z32mvU3FCGFCzm3kFh4aG8mt71vDgCU4Ozadwt_rbcbr0SuHgDzYZulwrxz2w3p_qOYOkJj0yghoA0PLN-k3tKFtIY-E8Y2Tz42yxp1XqO4ZllimVANvp03Wo_Id71GMv-n6Jg/s640/blogger-image-1019312596.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi7Tts78z32mvU3FCGFCzm3kFh4aG8mt71vDgCU4Ozadwt_rbcbr0SuHgDzYZulwrxz2w3p_qOYOkJj0yghoA0PLN-k3tKFtIY-E8Y2Tz42yxp1XqO4ZllimVANvp03Wo_Id71GMv-n6Jg/s640/blogger-image-1019312596.jpg"></a></div>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08837162911344469993noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-864898489645728666.post-55045956318502871362015-10-07T15:43:00.001-07:002015-10-07T15:43:20.626-07:00Finding my wayI don't know why but as women and moms we often take a back seat when it comes to taking care of ourselves. I finally realized wanting to look good, working out, getting your hair done, nails done, drinking the occasional Starbucks, going to the bookstore whatever it is you do to feel good about yourself is NOT selfish or shallow. When we as moms, wives, women feel good about ourselves we are happier. Being happy makes you a better mom, wife and person to be around.<br />
I have 7 kids and a grandbaby on the way. It's my 17yr old who is pregnant. My oldest moved back home so the only kid out is my second oldest and she's at college so she is still home for holidays etc. I have a full house to say the least! It was time for me to make myself a priority before I had a nervous breakdown. I decided to stop with the excuses and take control of my health, mental and physical. I still take on most of the house but between having everyone take care of their own stuff, like dishes, laundry etc and errands when possible I have a couple hours a day to do what I want.<br />
I have a ridiculous schedule of running around town taking kids back and forth to school and activities. I was so excited that the girls were starting kindergarten but then I found out it was half day. Well not even, Mondays they go 11:30-1, Tuesday-Friday 12:30-3. With my daughter being pregnant and due soon between the doctor visits and the other kids, not to mention my husband I find myself overwhelmed often. I really don't like feeling that way. I am the type of person that likes a plan and routine. Well that's out the window now! <br />
I finally decided to throw away all my excuses and get healthy. I started Beachbody in February and all I can say is it has been my lifesaver. It is a program that combines clean eating, drinking shakeology and working out. One of the things I love most is the community of women who support, encourage, share and motivate each other. This is not a quick fix, its a lifestyle. I have lost over 20 pounds and tons of inches. As much as that is so rewarding, fitting into clothes, being comfortable and loving my body for the first time in years, I have to say the best part is doing something just for MYSELF. Once you start working on yourself the rest truly does start to come together. Being physically fit has made me feel mentally fit to handle my day to day life. Do I always feel like being healthy and working out? No, but I press on anyway. I am never disappointed when I press play. When the workout gets easier, you are sweating and making progress it makes you feel so accomplished. You step back and you're like, I DID THAT! Its not always easy but always worth it. When I have a bad day, or I overate, had a drink of alcohol some chips or cake, whatever it is, its ok. A bad meal doesn't ruin or define your lifestyle. It doesn't mean oh well, you might as well give up. It means you enjoyed some treats and the next meal you get right back on track. <br />
I have decided to blog more and let you know how I am finding my way through the crazy!<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgh1Y0_ezO2lPgAPj80uhoUqeZt11YhQcNnbYbOlx6G0BLngJEGBKZkvgSS-70_MHlgtJ9xLGNetOZKYECR28ilgAdAz516EYjGn6JY1QT9NgiEuuroVtjxPJTVDEZkQqtIknf2Fsyepy8/s1600/IMG_0448.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgh1Y0_ezO2lPgAPj80uhoUqeZt11YhQcNnbYbOlx6G0BLngJEGBKZkvgSS-70_MHlgtJ9xLGNetOZKYECR28ilgAdAz516EYjGn6JY1QT9NgiEuuroVtjxPJTVDEZkQqtIknf2Fsyepy8/s320/IMG_0448.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
February April September<br />
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08837162911344469993noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-864898489645728666.post-46509479037384476022015-08-24T09:22:00.003-07:002015-08-24T09:22:46.034-07:00Being a mom is hard<span style="-webkit-composition-fill-color: rgba(130, 98, 83, 0.0980392); color: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.701961); font-family: UICTFontTextStyleBody; font-size: 17px; text-decoration: -webkit-letterpress;">This motherhood thing is coming full circle for me. </span><br />
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I've come to realize the secret is you have to have your own life outside of your kids... You know why? Well for starters they are kids and don't care about things the way you do, it's all about them and how much they can get.. If that's not enough they grow up and move out to have their own life!</div>
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Your kids can't be your only happiness... There are so many ups and downs, disappointments, bad choices that if you personalize every one you won't be able to function. Let it ride, they are kids, they will learn, go do what makes YOU happy.</div>
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You can be too involved and probably are... This has snuck up on me, it is so easy to do things for your child, work things out for them etc.. We convince ourselves that it's what good moms do.</div>
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You're damned if you do and damned if you don't... Meaning your kids want your opinion but they don't want you to disagree with them.</div>
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I always thought my problem with my mom was her, now having grown daughters I'm realizing some of it is me! I guess it's inevitable that we become the annoying mom!</div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08837162911344469993noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-864898489645728666.post-11407924566352217862015-01-15T13:44:00.001-08:002015-01-15T13:44:34.006-08:00Bring it!!<br><div style="color: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.701961); font-family: UICTFontTextStyleBody; -webkit-composition-fill-color: rgba(130, 98, 83, 0.0980392); text-decoration: -webkit-letterpress;">So far this year is off to a trying start to say the least. It's like the kids forgot where they live, what type of mom I am and all the rules! They have been testing me from lying to disrespect, even twins got in on the action and did some backtalk! It's like even though I didn't say it out loud things were going to good. So now between the home stuff, bad grades, an in school suspension and wild twins I seriously had to put it down. I will not stop moving forward.</div><div style="color: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.701961); font-family: UICTFontTextStyleBody; -webkit-composition-fill-color: rgba(130, 98, 83, 0.0980392); text-decoration: -webkit-letterpress;"> I realized life is pushing back because big change is in the air around here. It started last year and it will only continue to evolve. This August the twins will start school and for the first time in my life there will be no more babies for me. It's bittersweet but at the same time very exciting! You see I got married at 19 and by the time I was 20 had a baby. I never really just thought about myself. I've been in the thick of kids and babies for over 20 years! I feel like I can actually put myself first for a change! To be honest it's weird, and I don't want to waste time feeling guilty. I've put my time in and now it's time for me! </div><div style="color: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.701961); font-family: UICTFontTextStyleBody; -webkit-composition-fill-color: rgba(130, 98, 83, 0.0980392); text-decoration: -webkit-letterpress;">First step is reclaiming my body. As you can imagine having 7 kids has taken its toll. I'm eating better and working out. My focus is on feeling good, healthy and strong.</div><div style="color: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.701961); font-family: UICTFontTextStyleBody; -webkit-composition-fill-color: rgba(130, 98, 83, 0.0980392); text-decoration: -webkit-letterpress;">As long as my husband can handle it I plan to stay home. It may sound silly but I'm really looking forward to being alone! Maybe even bored and lonely! I have no idea what that feels like. I also just want to be able to do what I want when I want without an audience. You know the simple things, shower maybe even watch TV and not put the subtitles on. </div><div style="color: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.701961); font-family: UICTFontTextStyleBody; -webkit-composition-fill-color: rgba(130, 98, 83, 0.0980392); text-decoration: -webkit-letterpress;">I want to figure out who I am besides wife and mother. Being a mother is the best part of me but I also know my identity can't be wrapped up in my kids. Having a big family has taught me that I have to have healthy boundaries or else I would have a nervous breakdown every time my kids did something wrong. I need to be strong and teach them how to cope with life's ups and downs.</div><div style="color: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.701961); font-family: UICTFontTextStyleBody; -webkit-composition-fill-color: rgba(130, 98, 83, 0.0980392); text-decoration: -webkit-letterpress;">So bring it 2015, I'm getting ready!</div><div><br></div>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08837162911344469993noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-864898489645728666.post-3909463221308759632015-01-09T09:15:00.001-08:002015-01-09T09:15:27.611-08:00Enjoy the little things
<p style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br></p>
<p style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span style='color: black; font-family: "Calibri",sans-serif; font-size: 20pt;'> </span></p>
<p style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span style='color: black; font-family: "Calibri",sans-serif; font-size: 20pt;'>Is it just me or do you have a
hard time with this as well? You would think something as simple as this would
be easy to do but honestly it's the complete opposite. Sometimes I'm so focused
on what I have to do, the last thing I feel I have time to do is enjoy
anything. The day goes so fast, I hardly ever accomplish all I need to in one
day. I get so tired of the cooking, cleaning, wiping, laundry etc, and before I
know it the kids are home, and it's I'm hungry, getting homework done, usually
the bickering starts and I still have to figure out what time tryouts are done,
drama queen has work and then of course cooking dinner! Whew… I have to make an
effort every day to take the time to notice, let alone enjoy the little things!
So here is my list for today…….</span></p>
<p style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span style='color: black; font-family: "Calibri",sans-serif; font-size: 20pt;'>The weather was nice and I sat
outside for a few minutes and felt the sun on my face.</span></p><p style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span style='color: black; font-family: "Calibri",sans-serif; font-size: 20pt;'>My older daughter is still home from college.</span></p>
<p style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span style='color: black; font-family: "Calibri",sans-serif; font-size: 20pt;'>The girls got juggle bubbles, and
to see them smiling, laughing, bouncing bubbles around the living room brought
a smile to my face.</span></p>
<p style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span style='color: black; font-family: "Calibri",sans-serif; font-size: 20pt;'> </span></p>
<p style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span style='color: black; font-family: "Calibri",sans-serif; font-size: 20pt;'> </span></p>
<p style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span style='color: black; font-family: "Calibri",sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;'><img width="566" height="566" alt="Machine generated alternative text: " 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v:shapes="Picture_x0020_1"></span></p>
<p style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span style='color: black; font-family: "Calibri",sans-serif; font-size: 20pt;'> </span></p>
<p style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span style='color: black; font-family: "Calibri",sans-serif; font-size: 18pt;'>Of course what I always enjoy is
the quiet of the night when everyone is asleep!</span></p>
<p style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><span style='color: black; font-family: "Calibri",sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;'> </span></p>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08837162911344469993noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-864898489645728666.post-49932959223437188352015-01-04T18:44:00.001-08:002015-01-04T18:44:00.610-08:00What 2014 has taught me
<p style="margin: 0in; color: gray; font-family: Calibri; font-size: 10pt;"><br></p>
<p style="margin: 0in; font-family: Calibri; font-size: 11pt;">When the year
started I was feeling pretty down. I felt like everyone gets to do what they
want except me, I was feeling fat and frumpy , and<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>out of shape. I decided it was time to make
myself a priority and be confident in who I am.</p>
<p style="margin: 0in; font-family: Calibri; font-size: 11pt;">So this is what I
learned this year…….</p>
<p style="margin: 0in; font-family: Calibri; font-size: 11pt;"> </p>
<p style="margin: 0in; font-family: Calibri; font-size: 11pt;">It's ok if the house
isn't totally picked up.</p>
<p style="margin: 0in; font-family: Calibri; font-size: 11pt;">Dishes, laundry,
toys on the floor,<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>etc will still be
there tomorrow and the world won't come to an end.</p>
<p style="margin: 0in; font-family: Calibri; font-size: 11pt;"> </p>
<p style="margin: 0in; font-family: Calibri; font-size: 11pt;">It's ok for me to
put myself first. </p>
<p style="margin: 0in; font-family: Calibri; font-size: 11pt;">This has been the
hardest, biggest change I have made this year. I still don't do it every day,
but I always make sure I do at least one thing for myself EVERY DAY. Sometimes
it's a really small thing, like a shower, a piece of chocolate, a show I want to
watch. I have left the house alone to do something selfish and fun like my
hair, or nails! I can't tell you how awesome that has been. I wanted my hair
done for Christmas and so much needed to be done, so while I was getting my
hair done my husband went food shopping! </p>
<p style="margin: 0in; font-family: Calibri; font-size: 11pt;"> </p>
<p style="margin: 0in; font-family: Calibri; font-size: 11pt;">Making the time to
work out is worth it!</p>
<p style="margin: 0in; font-family: Calibri; font-size: 11pt;">I try and work out
as often as I can. Ideally 5-7 days a week but even 3 is ok. Not only have I
lost 15 pounds, I dropped two sizes and best of all I feel strong and fit! I
got a new kettle bell workout for Christmas and I can't wait to start it.</p>
<p style="margin: 0in; font-family: Calibri; font-size: 11pt;"> </p>
<p style="margin: 0in; font-family: Calibri; font-size: 11pt;">I finally feel
confident enough in my parenting to tell anyone to step back, we are not
looking for co parents!</p>
<p style="margin: 0in; font-family: Calibri; font-size: 11pt;">Have you ever
noticed when something major happens it's in front of other people? After
Christmas my son got in trouble, and of course he was with his grandparents so
they knew what happened. This time my husband and I were a united<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>front and even he told his parents to back
off. </p>
<p style="margin: 0in; font-family: Calibri; font-size: 11pt;"> </p>
<p style="margin: 0in; font-family: Calibri; font-size: 11pt;">Parenting is a dance
of keeping your kids close and letting go so they mature and get independent.</p>
<p style="margin: 0in; font-family: Calibri; font-size: 11pt;">I hate when people
say things like raise them right, trust your kids etc. The reality is good kids
make bad choices, they know what's right and choose bad anyway. We always want
to trust our kids, but sometimes we know we can't.</p>
<p style="margin: 0in; font-family: Calibri; font-size: 11pt;">I realized family
dynamics, ages of children etc are different for every family and its ok if
someone doesn’t understand mine.</p>
<p style="margin: 0in; font-family: Calibri; font-size: 11pt;"> </p>
<p style="margin: 0in; font-family: Calibri; font-size: 11pt;">I'm exactly where I
want to be.</p>
<p style="margin: 0in; font-family: Calibri; font-size: 11pt;">Getting older is
funny to me, I'm 42 years old and people still feel the need to tell me things
I should be doing. Recently one of my husbands friends was over, and he asked
me when the twins start school if I was going to work, and how even a little
job making $350 a week would be nice, right? Um wrong! First of all not only is
it none of his business but I'm exactly where I want to be. I know many people
don't get it, and the art of being a homemaker is getting lost, but I don't
plan on working. I want to give the twins the same experience all my other kids
got. I want to help in the classroom, have lunch<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>with them, be home when they are out of
school. Why should my older kids get them to and from school, help with
homework and start dinner? It's my job and I'm not giving it up. </p>
<p style="margin: 0in; font-family: Calibri; font-size: 11pt;"> </p>
<p style="margin: 0in; font-family: Calibri; font-size: 11pt;">This is my mantra..</p>
<p style="margin: 0in; font-family: Calibri; font-size: 11pt;">I am fit</p>
<p style="margin: 0in; font-family: Calibri; font-size: 11pt;">I am a good
mother/wife</p>
<p style="margin: 0in; font-family: Calibri; font-size: 11pt;">I am HAPPY</p>
<p style="margin: 0in; font-family: Calibri; font-size: 11pt;">I love my children
for who they are</p>
<p style="margin: 0in; font-family: Calibri; font-size: 11pt;">I focus on positive
good things</p>
<p style="margin: 0in; font-family: Calibri; font-size: 11pt;">I am proud of my
family</p>
<p style="margin: 0in; font-family: Calibri; font-size: 11pt;"> </p>
<p style="margin: 0in; font-family: Calibri; font-size: 11pt;">~One Tired Mama</p>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08837162911344469993noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-864898489645728666.post-43374056304012856972014-08-27T12:00:00.001-07:002014-08-27T12:00:32.745-07:00My child is not a reflection of me<span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: rgb(34, 34, 34); font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22px; -webkit-tap-highlight-color: rgba(26, 26, 26, 0.296875); -webkit-composition-fill-color: rgba(175, 192, 227, 0.230469); -webkit-composition-frame-color: rgba(77, 128, 180, 0.230469); "><br><br>I know what you're thinking as you read that statement, of course your child is a reflection of you. Well I'm here to tell you its not always the case. Have you noticed when your child does something good, gets good grades, says or does something that makes you proud, it's sooo easy to accept the compliments like way to go mom, wow, you sure are raising them right. But think of it this way, why would you take credit for your child's accomplishments? It's all them, they did the work. So in the same way I don't take credit for the misbehavior of my children, especially Drama Queen.<br>When you have an extremely defiant child, it's easy to feel like you're doing something wrong, you're not a good parent etc. This is where you have to be really careful. It can make you depressed and it can take the joy out of being a mother. I finally realized I needed to stop taking on Drama Queens personality as my responsibility. I just needed to accept her for who she is. This doesn’t mean that I agree with her behavior all the time, or how she treats friends, or even her siblings. It means I realize she is a person outside of me and she will find her own path.<br>As you can imagine this has been the hardest journey for me. My older two daughters were not like this. Drama Queen is the after miscarriage baby who was supposed to have Downs Syndrome miracle baby! It's not supposed to be like this! She will be 16 in January, and every year I hope things get better. As always some things do and other things never change. So, I changed the one thing I have control over, MYSELF. I no longer am embarrassed, or feel like a bad mom because my daughter acts a certain way, gets in trouble, or makes a bad decision. It's like, ok where do we go from here? What lesson am I trying to teach her? I want her to know I'm always here for her, she can trust me, and that HOME is a safe place. We all love and accept her in this house. On the days she's pushed me to the brink, I remember my own advice and walk away, I don't get sucked in. I tell her to go to her room.<br>I have hope in the fact that she's still young and you really can’t predict where people are going to end up in life when they're only 15! All I know is I do the best I can every day. People may judge, but I know inside of me that I’m a good mom.<br><br><br><br><br><br><br><br><br><br><br><br>Sent from my iPhone</span>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08837162911344469993noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-864898489645728666.post-23507740513557850922013-11-22T08:29:00.001-08:002013-11-22T08:29:31.482-08:00Mid life is like being a teenagerGetting older is not at all how I thought it would be. In some ways I feel more and more like a teen all the time. Here's what I mean...<br />
I find myself thinking why bother a lot.<br />
My period makes me wicked crabby, crampy and bloated.<br />
I get pimples.<br />
I could sleep all day.<br />
I don't know what I want to be when I grow up.<br />
I'm moody.<br />
I don't want to cook, clean or do laundry.<br />
I just want to have fun.<br />
I want to be left alone.<br />
I'm attached to my cell phone.<br />
I love to text.<br />
I keep things from my mom.<br />
Sometimes it's never enough.<br />
I have a problem, but I have no idea what it is.<br />
I want to run away. <br/><br/><div class="separator"style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjkYeV9QWdz7-BQZqoZQVs3ZcZTQHRHkrsPYgQfDuYQhyphenhyphenPioKkZ5tLiMKluoEzdqm_F6RwjZHYVp2M615xZIiN0suXnBjW5wK7Xwlx-FyCdffLfGQXp_p1kTk8Upb9wisxDLdVKHlPyrx8/s640/blogger-image-1792830577.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjkYeV9QWdz7-BQZqoZQVs3ZcZTQHRHkrsPYgQfDuYQhyphenhyphenPioKkZ5tLiMKluoEzdqm_F6RwjZHYVp2M615xZIiN0suXnBjW5wK7Xwlx-FyCdffLfGQXp_p1kTk8Upb9wisxDLdVKHlPyrx8/s640/blogger-image-1792830577.jpg" /></a></div>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08837162911344469993noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-864898489645728666.post-37265361720835619112013-08-07T11:05:00.001-07:002013-08-07T11:05:31.407-07:00How to keep your sanity when you have difficult teenagers....<br />
<br />
As you know I have a difficult teen I call drama queen. I guess you can say she's a typical teen of this time, but I don't like it one bit. It's been hard especially since she's my third child and so very different from everyone else. Maybe it is just middle child syndrome and she will be fine when she grows up and we will be best friends. But now, I find her disrespectful, rude, nasty, treats everyone in the house like crap, she does things on purpose just to be annoying and cause trouble. Oh, and the drama has no end, from her hair and clothes, to the boyfriend she wasn't supposed to have, to friend drama. She is overwhelming, loud, and stressful to put it mildly.<br />
I wish I could say I've handled it well, with grace and maturity. Actually the opposite is true. I've let my feelings get hurt, they cloud my judgement, I over react and say things I shouldn't. I'm learning, and each day gets better, and the days I blow it, I forgive myself. This parenting journey is hard!<br />
So, I've done some research, read some articles, tried some things, and when I pause and think instead of react this is what I do........<br />
<br />
The first thing is to realize when your child is acting out, calling names being disrespectful is, don't take it personally. I know easier said then done. Take a breath, calmly say it’s not okay to speak to me that way, I don’t like it. Then walk away.<br />
<br />
I don't believe in giving your child a second or third chance when he’s nasty or rude to you. <br />
<br />
Its our job as a parent to teach our kids how to behave appropriately and to be respectful toward others as they grow up. Respect starts in the home. I often tell her to treat others how she wants to be treated.<br />
<br />
Parenting has always been a balance between thinking and feeling, and both are very important. But don't get sucked into your teenagers disrespect, think first, then react.<br />
<br />
This is some things to say to your teen before things get totally out of control.....<br />
Is something wrong? Why are you using that tone with me?<br />
How come you get sarcastic every time we talk?<br />
It's your job to make me understand, and sarcasm doesn't help<br />
There is no name calling around this house<br />
<br />
I also feel parenting is not a popularity contest. You need to be in control and you need to set some limits. Your child is not your partner or your peer.<br />
<br />
When you are setting limits, and dealing with your teen think about what lesson does my child need to learn? What should I teach her here? <br />
The lesson should be related to the kind of person you want your child to grow into. <br />
<br />
You also want them to learn how to think for themselves and make good choices. In the end, we want our kids to be independent thinkers who are able to function as healthy adults in society.<br />
<br />
<br/><br/><div class="separator"style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgEIUxPmjZ3u2jIDZHL7ZkrXZF9XX2cbHhZkE2eh0SN-6H5dZ7tQ1_lhYAq-nx0sPBVAfiIEtswxOXLpZi1WMJDqMaziRJiEpYhVSqehd2LHfF84NbMI9YlrDb308avSKZNgXfnLubO6-8/s640/blogger-image--586857415.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgEIUxPmjZ3u2jIDZHL7ZkrXZF9XX2cbHhZkE2eh0SN-6H5dZ7tQ1_lhYAq-nx0sPBVAfiIEtswxOXLpZi1WMJDqMaziRJiEpYhVSqehd2LHfF84NbMI9YlrDb308avSKZNgXfnLubO6-8/s640/blogger-image--586857415.jpg" /></a></div>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08837162911344469993noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-864898489645728666.post-42395603910036711632013-07-03T11:26:00.001-07:002013-07-03T11:26:06.615-07:0021 years ago I married my best friend....<br />
<br />
I met my husband when I was 15, a sophomore in high school. A point my teenagers like to make often. I tell them yes I did fall in love at 15, but you have to remember dad and I are the exception to the rule! You see, I was what you would call an old soul. I grew up fast, barely had a childhood, and I did a lot of living by the time I married at 19. I was more than ready to be a wife, and a mother. <br />
The early years are some of my fondest memories. Being young, setting up our first house, having our first few babies. Those were the days! I found joy in everything I did, whether it was taking care of the kids, my husband or the house. I had so many plans, thoughts, and pictures of how I thought the rest of my life was going to go. This was my big mistake! I set myself up for disappointment. This journey, being a wife, and mother has a life of its own, and I have little control over it! My new thing now, and what I'm telling my kids is to just limit planning, let things just be, go with the flow, see where things are going, and LIVE! Enjoy being young, and don't rush everything.<br />
When you're together over 20 years it's a long time. I'm at the point now I don't know my life without my husband. You're talking 26 years of my life! <br />
After all these years we have weathered quite a few storms. I realize now, marriage takes a lot of give and take. It's all about compromise, protecting your marriage, and spending time together. These things don't come as easily as they do in the early years. Life is stressful, work, money issues, in laws, kids, it gets overwhelming sometimes. It's funny how easy it is to start blaming each other, not really talking, letting the kids come between you, fighting about dumb things that really aren't important. The reality is our kids grow up and move out, we will probably never have enough money, and life is stressful.<br />
You know what I figured out? When I'm sad, mad, happy, want to go out, have fun, need a hug, you know who's always there? That's right, my best friend, the love of my life, my HUSBAND! I'm so thankful that after all these years we not only still love each other, we love to spend TIME with each other. I'm looking forward to all the years we will have together. :)<br />
<br/><br/><div class="separator"style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEii4WfXY6mPHxEnlZVp3ujGt000-zMjV6XKGaV0Imbk_277PJV6vk23qX1b9M6QWCOB3Uce-PxGVrw6IYNnpvC6sGqYbU_-ifAj81ekGLz89RHh4zW4BQDzZmkXxs1wOt0ayC4OKdSNi_8/s640/blogger-image-586436731.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEii4WfXY6mPHxEnlZVp3ujGt000-zMjV6XKGaV0Imbk_277PJV6vk23qX1b9M6QWCOB3Uce-PxGVrw6IYNnpvC6sGqYbU_-ifAj81ekGLz89RHh4zW4BQDzZmkXxs1wOt0ayC4OKdSNi_8/s640/blogger-image-586436731.jpg" /></a></div>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08837162911344469993noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-864898489645728666.post-51412836092972542342013-05-12T11:59:00.001-07:002013-05-12T11:59:45.164-07:00Mothers day 2013<br />
<br />
Being a mother has been quite the journey for me. I have been a mom for 20 years now. When I think about that, honestly I can't believe it! I really enjoyed the early years. Having a house full of little kids was an amazing time in my life. I really didn't give much thought to how being a mom changes as your children get older. It's as if one day your mommy, making everything better and decisions seem so easy. Then suddenly your child is growing up, testing you in ways you didn't know existed! Everything seems to have changed overnight. I was unprepared to say the least for what having older kids would bring.<br />
<br />
I went through a couple years of battling feelings I never thought I would have, and that left me feeling so lost. To be in a horrible place, feeling like why bother? I don't want this anymore, what did I do to myself? I have 7 children for crying out loud! I don't know if I'm going to make it...I have no idea what I'm doing! People say the problem with kids and teens today is we don't beat them, or discipline, or spank or use the belt. In my heart I know this can't be true. How can you love your kids too much? I was that kid and teen who was hit. Did I fear my mom? Yes. But I was literally afraid. I never wanted my children to feel that. I didn't want to walk by my kids and have them flinch thinking I was going to smack them. I didn't want them to never want to hug me, or be close to me. I treasure every hug from my kids. I wanted them to feel safe, and protected in my arms, never afraid of me. I loved when they were little and I could make everything all better, or when they had a nightmare and they came to me to feel safe. <br />
<br />
This is what I figured out during these trying times. When it gets hard, it doesn't mean you can quit. It doesn't mean I can just stop being mom. What it means is, I have to dig deep. I have to keep on keeping on. I have to do what I think is best, even when the kids don't understand why. I have to love them, even when it's hard. Even on those days I feel like running away screaming I QUIT THIS MOMMY SHIT! THIS ISN'T HOW IT'S SUPPOSED TO BE! I have to focus on what I want to teach them, how things work in this life, how to treat people, and how to be respectful even when they don't feel like it. I need to set the example, I need to well be, the MOM. Sometimes it's not about what the kids want, or keeping them happy. It's not always fun, and as I've said before its not always rewarding. My job is to care for them, guide them, and just love them and be here for them. I do hope for the day when their life comes full circle, and they understand what I was doing. I also have to realize, they may never, and it's ok. I will always be able to say well you were so wanted and so loved. I loved you and raised you the best I knew how. <br />
<br />
So now like anything else, I'm learning to just go with it. Im re discovering the joy of mothering. Having a grown daughter, teens, tweens, and 3 year old twins, has made me realize that I will always be mom, no matter how old my children are, and it's the best part of me. This crazy, stressful life no one understands, is my reason for being here. My purpose, my joy, my every breath.<br />
<br/><br/><div class="separator"style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj293IKP4jwchNgZE5eI4iH40tfBhFn1EkGHsVhMDgJrayTX1hiKbvIQRUsXyB7IZeI1OcXcQR5IinJo7wfnq3Jb7fzrGX8uofyzqcycEwtY3gS7iLGzWJYkPrREoOIWEAsm1l64wqWy3E/s640/blogger-image--488509318.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj293IKP4jwchNgZE5eI4iH40tfBhFn1EkGHsVhMDgJrayTX1hiKbvIQRUsXyB7IZeI1OcXcQR5IinJo7wfnq3Jb7fzrGX8uofyzqcycEwtY3gS7iLGzWJYkPrREoOIWEAsm1l64wqWy3E/s640/blogger-image--488509318.jpg" /></a></div>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08837162911344469993noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-864898489645728666.post-16570620948577018982013-03-20T12:41:00.001-07:002015-01-08T13:13:08.779-08:00Parenting perspective is everything.......... If you notice in life, perspective is everything.<br>
Most people with young kids, even though they are tired, are loving every minute of it.<br>
The women with teens/older kids that haven't really done anything against the family can't figure out what's not great about being a mom.<br>My life has been harder than I expected, but I am stronger because of it.<br>
I know the pain of losing two babies<br>
I know the toll a defiant teen takes<br>
I know what it's like to have to fight for my son, at school, and sometimes everywhere!<br>
I know the heartache of a daughter turning against her family and in the process suffering some bad consequences.<br>
What I do know, is the hard times make the good times even more joyous<br>
I know the joy of a child who I am very close with. She graduated with honors, made some bad choices, and has since come back to me, and our home. She has totally turned her life around, and I couldn't be more proud of her.<br>
I know the joy of a child who made it to state honor band, is top of her class, and the top tennis player on her team<br>
I know drama like no other! LOL, seriously though my drama queen cares deeply, we have had some sweet moments, she definitely has a mind of her own, and she is so talented when it comes to hair and makeup<br>
I know the joy of progress. When I think about how far my son has come, it brings tears to my eyes. He is the most tender hearted, funny, amazing kid.<br>
I know the joy of having a 9 year old who in some ways is more mature than her older sisters! She is curious, observant, and so smart. She has so many talents, drawing, playing the flute, she makes crafts out of everyday stuff. She loves so deeply and open.<br>
I know the joy of twins! From the amazing pregnancy, that at 37 yes I did carry them to term! To how different their relationship is with each other than just a sister. To see how even though they are the same, they are so different. To see their own likes, and dislikes, their little personalities starting to shine. To how fun they are. Every where we go it's an adventure. They make the boring everyday nonsense less boring. I didn't know I had it in me. I was scared to death to have twins. Might sound dumb, but I'm so proud they are potty trained! That was quite the adventure!<br>
What I have learned through all this is I try to never take a day for granted. Kids are kids, and we don't have the control people like to think we do as parents. Good kids make bad choices. When a teen is spiraling out of control, sometimes it has nothing to do with her home life, or her parents suck. Dont be so quick to judge what you don't understand. Some kindness and compassion go a long way. We all as parents want what's best for our kids, we just do it differently. What works, and motivates one kid, doesn't work for all of them. Parenting is hard, and there is no "right way" there is only the way that works for you.<br>
<br><br><div class="separator" style="text-align: center; clear: both;"><a style="margin-right: 1em; margin-left: 1em;" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgo1cBjgFsRxIY7qvjHx7bQAobJCPHU0hWPgmHcGs-UaJFtdJUWbunvwgiNanv5HFfGGqepHSaXqIZnJd0XMcRulygvjAtm43-XySkgA3-Uk5VIKvJ-NCDMh9sXk5IW17DmAu1CskfBq6w/s640/blogger-image-363738632.jpg" imageanchor="1"><img src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgo1cBjgFsRxIY7qvjHx7bQAobJCPHU0hWPgmHcGs-UaJFtdJUWbunvwgiNanv5HFfGGqepHSaXqIZnJd0XMcRulygvjAtm43-XySkgA3-Uk5VIKvJ-NCDMh9sXk5IW17DmAu1CskfBq6w/s640/blogger-image-363738632.jpg" border="0"></a></div>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08837162911344469993noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-864898489645728666.post-56738053196463314602013-03-06T18:44:00.001-08:002013-03-07T11:40:34.376-08:00Being a wife, mother and being yourself is not an easy balance<br />
Parenting is the hardest journey of our lives! We start out so in love with our babes, hopeful of the future and who they will become. We have all these hopes and dreams for them whether we admit it or not. We all start this journey thinking, my mom did this and I hated it I won't do that, or I want to be the type of mother I had growing up. Add in the husbands, more kids, in laws, for some blended families and suddenly it's nothing like when you were growing up and it's definitely not how you envisioned it would be. But guess what? It's ok. Life is really just one big mystery. No one has all the answers, and what works for some families doesn't work for all. BUT, EVERYONE has their issues. Don't let anyone fool you into believing everything is great all the time. That their kids are just so perfect, follow all the rules and are "A" students. We all have our unique struggle. Always remember you were chosen to be the mom of your children.<br />
Then if that's not complicated enough, we as women start changing. Our kids start growing up, and for some of us the process is really difficult. We know we are preparing our kids to live life on their own and be responsible adults. But when it's happening, the natural process of kids growing apart from you, it is sometimes painful and bittersweet at its best. Yes we complain, and want a break. But we want it when they are 3! Not when we see the awesome people they are, how we can have a real conversation with them now. But now they are a senior in HS and we know we have to start letting them go, or they won't be prepared for college, or how to make decisions on their own. So what do we do? We say sure go, have some fun, be safe, be home on time, wave goodbye, and when they leave the sadness creeps in. Wow, what am I going to do this summer when she's not here anymore? She won't even have to ask or tell me she's going to the movies. Will I talk to her everyday? Will she be ok? Actually the real question is will I be okay? <br />
Well, if you're like me, you don't have a choice. I have a house full of kids, and I can't get consumed by sadness. I have to prep the younger ones that it's ok, she will be home when she can, breaks and holidays. Hey we can Skype! Meanwhile I'm crying inside. When did my baby grow up?<br />
Then on top of all that for some reason when we hit 40, it's like being a teen all over again. Our hormones are changing, our skin, hair, body suddenly look different. Our feelings and emotions seem like they are on overdrive. For me, most of the time I get angry. Everything annoys me! Was it always like this, or am I just noticing it now? Why is it like this? I have less patience, I'm not in the mood for anything sometimes. Then out of nowhere I will feel down. For me, I'm not used to these feelings. I don't like them at all. I am the type who barely cries, some have even called me ice queen. It's not that I don't have feelings or empathy, I just don't see a need to cry about it. I'm a thinker, doer, just fix it right? Well sometimes WRONG! I'm going about my day and bam, something triggered and I feel a couple tears sneaking out. Thankfully it comes and goes, I'm getting a handle on it. It made me realize, wow, if people who are depressed feel like this alll the time, no wonder they are having such a hard time. For me, for now, I'm riding it out. I am very in touch with my feelings, talk about them, and I realized more women feel like this than they admit. We all cope in our own ways, and I guess that's why it's so hard for me to let go of the food. It makes me feel better. Started as a kid, and since I was 9 food is my best friend. Weird I know, but like I said, we all have our issues. <br />
Thankfully I have a very understanding and supportive husband, and now I have my awesome FB page and some ladies who I call my friends. It really helps me cope. Life skills and coping skills are very important to me. I had a rough childhood to say the least and I made it out ok, if I can do that i can certainly survive mid life!<br />
<br/><br/><div class="separator"style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhF81fgy4LoKOht38kijxPBurJZbtjyb9vKZpOKOxCz9liOb9ka-hvPTrDn_Qe5wSM-FQBvb6r0MkOz4V7WKXsVsVlL7jWECFr_wjnmF5PFezp07X3rhvnGXMsgjAtAbHxqE5J8rEl1hGs/s640/blogger-image--649770973.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhF81fgy4LoKOht38kijxPBurJZbtjyb9vKZpOKOxCz9liOb9ka-hvPTrDn_Qe5wSM-FQBvb6r0MkOz4V7WKXsVsVlL7jWECFr_wjnmF5PFezp07X3rhvnGXMsgjAtAbHxqE5J8rEl1hGs/s640/blogger-image--649770973.jpg" /></a></div>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08837162911344469993noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-864898489645728666.post-77301350198664615762013-02-28T08:27:00.001-08:002013-02-28T08:27:05.759-08:00So I had to admit something to myself today.......<br />
<br />
I think I've been so focused on how hard the twins are because I really can't believe my having baby days are behind me. I'm breathing heavy on 41, my oldest will be 20 in a few weeks, and I have 7 children. My husband is more than done, my body is done, and we can't afford to have anymore. I know all this, I've come to terms with it, I myself feel done, I just can't believe I'm done! Sounds crazy I know, but I just love having kids, and can't imagine my life without little ones running around. This is all I've known the last 20 years! I know everyone talks about freedom, and spending time with the husband but I just can't picture it. I think part of me is afraid. My identity is wrapped up in the children. Is this bad? I don't know, I go back and forth on this one. Sometimes I think I should have a life outside this house, but the truth is I don't want one! I don't have any regrets. I don't regret not going to college or having a career. I actually just wish I could relive the last 20 years! Getting older scares me, it's all so unknown...what will I do? Do I have to do anything? Everything is changing so fast, sometimes I feel like I can't breathe. <br />
I'm taking my own advice, slowing down and enjoying everything! Every annoying, frustrating, minute! From washing the crayon off the walls, to those sweet snuggles I still get. For right now all 7 are home. I love it, it feels complete. By summer 2 will probably move out, but for now, I'm not thinking about it. <br />
I'm slowly doing more for myself, finding myself again, asking for help. If I'm not showered, the house is not clean, but I hugged all my babes and told them I love them, talked to them, laughed with them, then it was a productive day. Not everyone understands, but it's ok. I'm living life the only way I know how, being here for my family, and I wouldn't want it any other way. <br/><br/><div class="separator"style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhYi9KjtcDD_vqOOAecfDF5YcUQVgPQ7NOnfaNBm_K8y588W8Fo-cBl_RnyL4ZHSW4PfffQxzsfkm-RpJgAXv5bKeV0Qxn5UaSX0FokMUMpwEnP1deEk0p6dXvgREa4HpUN7lm4SFQ7k2Q/s640/blogger-image--1205047664.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhYi9KjtcDD_vqOOAecfDF5YcUQVgPQ7NOnfaNBm_K8y588W8Fo-cBl_RnyL4ZHSW4PfffQxzsfkm-RpJgAXv5bKeV0Qxn5UaSX0FokMUMpwEnP1deEk0p6dXvgREa4HpUN7lm4SFQ7k2Q/s640/blogger-image--1205047664.jpg" /></a></div>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08837162911344469993noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-864898489645728666.post-51832534627241260592013-02-25T11:26:00.001-08:002013-02-25T11:26:36.804-08:00A mothers love<br />
<br />
Ever since I can remember I wanted to be a mom. I couldn't wait to have children. For me being an only child was lonely. I always wished I had a brother or sister. My dad remarried and had kids, but it wasn't the same, I didn't grow up with them plus I lived with my mom and she only had me. I always knew I would have a big family.<br />
When I started having children, I never really thought about when they got older. Teenagers seem so far away when you're pregnant, and when you're dealing with toddlers, preschoolers and a newborn, you're so overwhelmed there is a part of you that can't wait for them to get older. Then one day, it feels like it happens overnight, you have a house full of older children! When you really look at them you're amazed! They're so grown up, beautiful, smart, you are so in awe of them, and the fact you had a part in who they are. Now is when you want to spend time with them, talk to them, get to know them. But this is not what actually happens.<br />
Intellectually, you understand. This is their time, their life, their time to shine, make good choices, make mistakes, get hurt, and learn about life. This is the time I was most unprepared for. I didn't realize how much letting them go would hurt. I didn't realize how much seeing them hurt, or make a bad decision, would effect me. I never felt heartache like that before. I didn't think about how they would rather be anywhere but home. How they would have a boyfriend, how I would have to let them go, how another family would be a part of their life. Someone else cooking for them, spending time with MY babes! <br />
I wasn't close to my parents because they couldn't be bothered. I figured when I had kids everything would be different. I would be close to my kids, and they would be close to me. I guess I thought they would want to hang out at home.<br />
I thought they would be nicer to each other, be closer. I have talked to plenty of people and it's normal, this stage of life is right on track. I'm just off track about it! Things will turn around I'm sure, as far as kids go we are close, I guess I'm just really possessive of what's mine. <br />
This mid life older kids, adult children is a whole new world. I can say when they want to hang out, I'm there! It makes me wonder, maybe working moms, and moms who have kept friendships and have a life outside the house have it easier. All I know is I'm soooo glad I have my littles. I just told my hubby, I'm so thankful you gave in to me and had all these kids. I'm nowhere near ready for an empty nest! <br/><br/><div class="separator"style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjX3l75vjxcPurKycBQKTnr61hlr1X-DSjXa3zNi8-3qkcdU_FSTC3IRTJDXa5krVxoc3YV3WV32h1H47huUXKOj4SlQ4Puq9871zLnW9G3VtmlA6N1-Quechz0U55zrIKmvJWuqxWhfFQ/s640/blogger-image--2103883536.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjX3l75vjxcPurKycBQKTnr61hlr1X-DSjXa3zNi8-3qkcdU_FSTC3IRTJDXa5krVxoc3YV3WV32h1H47huUXKOj4SlQ4Puq9871zLnW9G3VtmlA6N1-Quechz0U55zrIKmvJWuqxWhfFQ/s640/blogger-image--2103883536.jpg" /></a></div>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08837162911344469993noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-864898489645728666.post-10260749157460890222013-02-20T08:15:00.001-08:002013-02-20T08:15:28.772-08:00Mid life have you feeling rebellious?<br />
<br />
Feelings ebb and flow. Now that we are older our hormones are fluctuating getting us ready for menopause. How exciting huh? And we thought being a teenager was hard! Ha! Add to that most of us have been at the wife and mom thing a long time now. Our emotions are on over drive, kinda like when we were pregnant, we just don't have a good excuse now. Now add in the day to day....get up, get kids ready, school, HW, cooking cleaning, sickness, the never ending wiping from the floor to little butts! Add to that some of us like myself have the uh, joy of adult children. With everything magnified, we feel over worked, under paid, taken advantage of and we have no time for ourselves. If that's not bad enough, we sleep like shit! If the kids aren't waking us up, it's the husband snoring. If its not that, our mind won't turn off. If not that you might have some insomnia. And on and on and on it goes. This vicious life sucking hole. All we really want is a break, to feel good about ourselves and some appreciation. Do we get that? Uh no. If you're cranky, you get what the hell is your problem? If your emotional you get, ok, ok, just don't cry. If you lean more towards the angry bitch like myself, you get, I'm so tired of the angry. Why does everything make you mad? What do you want from me? Stop yelling. <br />
For me personally, I have had a hard time with all of it! My daughters are so young and beautiful, and free! Sometimes I'm jealous. Not jealous like it effects our relationship, just makes me think, wow, time flies, I wish they would........and they NEVER do what I think, and it's hard to let go! Then I can be feeling pretty good, my daughter will jump in the mirror with me, and when I see our reflection I'm like, wow, I look like an old mom! I know, duh, I am. But really realizing how youth, and beauty fade does nothing for you ego. I have such a hard time losing weight, being consistent with diet and exercise. I always end up thinking who cares? I'm married with 7 children for crying out loud, what difference does it make? <br />
At this stage, at least for me, I feel like there is nothing exciting to look forward to. You know how when you're young it's all about getting married, having kids, buying a house, watching your kids grow etc. now it's like oh joy I'm getting older, another ache and pain, where did this come from? Etc<br />
Then I'm keeping the kids accountable, and they test and push, add to that I have 3 year old twins! To be honest most of the time I'm amazed I made it through another day! <br />
Then the husband, maybe it is me, I guess if I'm honest, I don't know what I always want him to do, I just feel like he's not doing it! When he's around I want help. I want him to do some of the crap work. Of course he's looking to relax, he works, blah blah. Well, I work too! When is my day off? <br />
So what ends up happening, at least to me is I rebel. Yep, like a teenager. I think well I'm just not going to do anything I don't feel like doing. I don't put my husbands clothes away, don't make him breakfast, dumb stuff. Why am I always the responsible one? Why is it on me to keep everything together? I'm TIRED! Tired of everything! <br />
But you know what? I only end up hurting myself. My husband is annoyed with me, kids take advantage, there is strife in the home, it's a wreck, chores are piled up, appointments need to be made, we still need to eat! And so I'm snapped back to reality, that whether it is fair or not, things have to get done, and being a stay at home mom, it is my job. I did agree to it. Does this mean I don't need help? Of course not, but I need to be the example, I need to be in charge, I need to follow through and be consistent. And even when Im not always feeling that loving feeling for the kids, cleaning, the husband etc, I must choose to keep on keeping on. When I really think about it, I wouldn't want it any other way.I love the joy of being the one to see my kids milestones, to be the one who comforts them, to be the one who everyone looks to for love and support, and encouragement. I know it will be worth it in the end. :) <br/><br/><div class="separator"style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj3euTSLO2HZXQ_LEaOF9QM36qUgfK0HYUPEGBxmYWDS53bbZTVX2JGQ51nsR_-oi1TLJ7km7jVmIH_99WsVWojBYHqHEEw_o9rmDED_GEM4EWqOITT_zMHWAnkOrCABBM4DhDQMUTmMxI/s640/blogger-image-605824828.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj3euTSLO2HZXQ_LEaOF9QM36qUgfK0HYUPEGBxmYWDS53bbZTVX2JGQ51nsR_-oi1TLJ7km7jVmIH_99WsVWojBYHqHEEw_o9rmDED_GEM4EWqOITT_zMHWAnkOrCABBM4DhDQMUTmMxI/s640/blogger-image-605824828.jpg" /></a></div>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08837162911344469993noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-864898489645728666.post-22594665672903369102013-02-06T12:52:00.001-08:002013-02-06T12:52:33.764-08:00Respect<br />
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Respect means different things to people. I guess you can say we are an old school typical loud, tell it like it is, large Italian family. We talk about everything, have an opinion about it, discuss it, usually loudly and we will all say no I wasn't yelling!<br />
Where I live there are not many families, or moms like me. My kids call you Mr and Mrs so and so. I have found most people don't like it, and will usually say its ok, call me by my first name. No it's not ok, it's about respect, and I expect your child to call me Mrs. We call our friends by their first name. A 5 year old is not my friend. The boy that comes to the house to pick up my daughter is not my friend. The teacher at school is not my friend, etc.<br />
When an adult comes over, friend, family, someone new, it is appropriate to stop what you are doing, and say hello. Put your phone down, get your ass off the couch and shake hands, saying nice to meet you. <br />
If you are a boy and you come for my daughters, you get out of your car, come to the door, come in say hello etc. Over my dead body will my daughter run out to a car beeping it's horn!<br />
If you are at someone's house and don't like something, be polite about it. Don't say ewwww this looks gross. Try it, you might like it, and if not, just don't eat it, and say thank you anyway.<br />
If you are a boy and are at my house for dinner, you take your hat off!<br />
When someone is talking to you, put your phone down, and look at them<br />
No texting during dinner<br />
Now of course besides common courtesy, and how to treat others, respecting us as parents and your siblings is priority. If there is no respect in the home, how can they show respect when they are not?<br />
Here is what I do in the home...<br />
As soon as my kids can talk the prompting starts, please, thank you etc<br />
We don't say give me, it's can I have....<br />
The biggest thing I do which I feel really let's the kids know what's expected is we have family meetings where we sit around the table and discuss things, like rules etc. we also tell them that being a part of our family is special. We are not just out for ourselves, we work together as a team. We are a family of 9so of course everything isn't going to be your mess, or your fault, but if something needs to get done you do it anyway. Meanness is not acceptable here, angry outbursts require an apology and we honor each other in this house which means treating each other as special.<br />
They are not allowed to say I hate you to us or their siblings. You can say its not fair, I hate the rules etc but not I hate you.<br />
The older children sometimes like to think they are co parents, or above the rules since they are older. Um no, learn your place, you are kids, we are parents.<br />
Ok, so of course this does not mean my kids, me or my house is perfect. Of course my kids get sassy, have bad attitudes, disrespect etc. The difference is it's not accepted, and I'm on it. Nothing bothers me more than rude kids, who don't know their place. I'm okay with being the mean mom, my kids not liking me since they are not my friends anyway, and people not understanding how I do things. Just today my sister was talking to me, and there is a lot she doesn't get. Well her kids are young right now, she will get it when it's happening and realize what I meant, one day...<br />
this generation is really upsetting, and I don't want my kids to just not care and be like everyone else. Parents give their kids too much, too soon and wonder why at 16 they expect a car for their birthday. Or why does a 10 yr old need a smart phone? I've done some changes around here, and you know it's not just about the money. It's about respect, responsibility, sense of entitlement etc. My drama queen who is 15 no longer has a cell phone, my 17 yr old is getting switched to a regular phone. Not only am I saving $40 a month, these things are not necessity! They are luxuries, and when they can afford them for themselves, they can have them. Why are some parents working 3 jobs so their kids have material things? Or vacations? Or nice cars? What happened to just spending time together? Laughing, talking? Get crazy, play a card game, take a walk, go to the park....trust me your kids will remember that more than the iPhone you bought them.<br />
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08837162911344469993noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-864898489645728666.post-91023727292724615602013-01-15T15:29:00.001-08:002013-01-15T15:29:25.034-08:00It just doesn't make sense to me........<br />
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Strong willed, compliant, typical, special needs~It doesn't matter what you have or what you call it, Parenting is HARD! Whether you have 1 or 12 children it' still HARD! Married, single, blended, still HARD! Stay at home, working, still HARD! Different parenting styles, different kids~ we all still have the same goal. We want responsible, loving, well adjusted, successful children, who will always be close to their family. Do you really think parents rub their pregnant bellies saying, I hope you grow up to be the biggest asshole, I hope you give us a hard time everyday for the rest of your life? Of course not, give me a break! I still want to know why as parents, and especially women, do you waste so much time and energy competing, comparing and cutting each other down? Why can't we spend that same time and energy encouraging each other?<br />
How much better would you feel after a shitty day with the kids for someone to come along side you, whether literally or online, and say, I UNDERSTAND, I've been there, this mom stuff isn't for wimps, hang in there, better days are coming.<br />
How about the mom who has the out of control teenager? How nice it would be to hear, sorry you are going through that right now, you're a GOOD MOM, she will come around, you have done all you can do, I'm here if you need me to just talk, vent, or cry to.<br />
How about the mom who is so lost and confused about the best way to help her child? How nice it would be to hear, you're doing a good job, He's lucky to have you, it must be so hard, you're a GOOD MOM, I'm here if you need me.<br />
Do you have any idea how hard it is to fight for your child's education EVERYDAY? To see your child with love, kindness, compassion, always wanting the best for him and sending them to a place that doesn't understand him at all? Do you have any idea how much time these moms spend researching, emailing, talking, and going to meetings? Do you know the horror of sitting in a meeting with a room full of people who don't really give a shit about your child and all they say is how "low" he is, and they even have charts on it? Well if you don't, let me tell you, you are LUCKY!<br />
How about the mom whose oldest child goes off and does her own thing, which is the complete opposite of how she was raised and what the parents expected...How nice it would be to hear, you're a GOOD MOM, she is a GOOD KID, she is just finding her way, it will be OKAY!<br />
Do you know how that judgement feels? To be praised for your child's success, only to be judged and put down and how now you are a shitty mom, for her failures? <br />
Next time you see "that mom" take a pause, and think how she must be feeling. Instead of a glare, snicker, or a rude comment, try offering her a warm smile, a hug, or a kind word. It will go a long way, I promise you.Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08837162911344469993noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-864898489645728666.post-11433290021615107002012-12-29T10:12:00.001-08:002012-12-29T10:15:11.024-08:00Looking forward.....2013<br />
No more excuses<br />
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Ever wake up, and think, how did I end up here? Not in the I drank so much last night way, in the way of you feel lost, yet your in the same place you have always been? I think it's been gradual, it's happened over a lot of years, a lot of children, some of it is laziness, complacency, whatever it is, I'm over it. Things are changing, and this is the year I see it through. I think one of the biggest disappointing realities for me has been that the older I got, the harder life got. I always thought when I was younger, as I got older I would be more confident, sure of who I was and I would have a clear direction for my life. HA! That didn't happen. Actually the opposite did. I've spent the last year thinking about what needs to change. Here is what I've come up with.....<br />
First, I have to lose weight. I went through the I just had twins its ok, then I'm old, married, had 7 children blah blah. All just excuses. The truth is for me, whether it's shallow or not I don't care. Looking good is important to me. The heavier I am, the less confident I am, and I feel like crap. Now I say, I don't look my age, I have a few good years left, and I have a goal dress for my daughters high school graduation in May. I've lost 10 pounds since thanksgiving, and I feel amazing already! Can't imagine how good 20 more will feel.<br />
I will work out, when I can. My life isn't really in a place right now I can work out everyday for hours. If I have 20 minutes today, then I will use it. As I get more fit, I will probably up my workouts. For now, I do walking miles. 2-5 when I can, but at least 3 times a week.<br />
I will do something for myself EVERY DAY! This may sound silly, but as I said, I ended up in a bad place. Always last, not taking care of myself. I don't think I was even on my list of things to do. I will work out, shower, take a bath, read, watch tv, talk on the phone, write, whatever I decide for that day. I will also get an eye exam, and go to the dentist. If I'm able I will get my nails done.<br />
I will not do everything anymore. Actually, I've been making this change already and I've had great results. Why I waited all these years, and kids to start is beyond me. I'm one person, and taking care of 9 people's needs is too much. Everyone helps out whether they like it or not, from the garbage to laundry. With my older kids, if they want something from me, they have to earn it, work for it, some how. Yesterday my daughter cleaned the bathroom before she could go to the movies.<br />
I am a very outspoken person, except where my husband is concerned. This is really the area I've most lost myself. I still can't figure out how it's happened. I will find my voice, not be afraid of conflict, and talk about real issues. You know things are great when you don't talk about real life, or use the kids as an excuse. There are a couple things that need to change, and this is the year I make it happen. I'm done making sure everything is ok for my husband. How about things are how I like it? I'm not smoothing everything out anymore. If I don't agree, or like something, I will speak up. If my feelings are hurt, I will say it, etc. stuff like that. Sounds silly I know. If you would have told me 15 years ago I would be in the place I'm in now, I would've laughed at you. Yeah, mama wants that feisty girl back, I like her. This complacent little housewife, um yeah, not so much.<br />
I don't really have too many goals where the kids are concerned, just the usual like, hold them accountable, don't let them disrespect me, and be positive.<br />
You know what I realized? I'm actually not a negative person. I was raised by a negative mother, and my husband can be quite negative. I've spent years trying to not slip into negativity while surrounded by negativity! The good news is, this is one issue I've brought up with the husband, and one of his goals this year is to be a positive influence over the family, so I have good feelings about it.<br />
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<br/><br/><div class="separator"style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj4_AvXPWzKFg4b9F2qaVeSIeWkwg87S0vICNodOpIOPNdohP_IXI-c4DbYDnCqHR0d-8euh4WW7AfpNEd0CdvrPZA0Wl7Dl3xI-Emv5Jsx2tPo9MZTJ1JX30cfwBzG5v0GHHQutKUbp9Q/s640/blogger-image--2045936673.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj4_AvXPWzKFg4b9F2qaVeSIeWkwg87S0vICNodOpIOPNdohP_IXI-c4DbYDnCqHR0d-8euh4WW7AfpNEd0CdvrPZA0Wl7Dl3xI-Emv5Jsx2tPo9MZTJ1JX30cfwBzG5v0GHHQutKUbp9Q/s640/blogger-image--2045936673.jpg" /></a></div>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08837162911344469993noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-864898489645728666.post-41264721019122816382012-12-12T14:09:00.002-08:002012-12-12T14:09:51.428-08:00I'm on my way......<span class="Apple-style-span" style="-webkit-composition-fill-color: rgba(130, 98, 83, 0.09375); -webkit-composition-frame-color: rgba(191, 107, 82, 0.496094); -webkit-tap-highlight-color: rgba(26, 26, 26, 0.296875); -webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-family: Noteworthy; font-size: 18px; font-weight: bold; line-height: 24px;">Ok, here is what I figured out........<div>
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I am done having children. </div>
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I remember asking other moms, how do you know when you are done? They said you will just know. Yep, now I know. 7 is enough for me :D</div>
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Being a stay at home mom is not always fulfilling.</div>
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I guess since I have been doing this for 19 years now, I realize I'm getting tired of it. The upside is, yes I do have older children now and I make them work around the house.</div>
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With what I know now, I will help my daughters set things up a little different. </div>
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Yes, being home does mean you do most of the work, but I think when your husband comes home, you should get an hour to yourself and he can take care of the kids. I also think he should help with doctor and dentist appointments, as well as parent teacher conferences, or taking them to a friends house. I also think a call on the way home with hey honey do you need anything? Would be nice since I know I need milk or bread most of the time.</div>
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It's important to make yourself a priority.</div>
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I don't know exactly how it happened, but over the years I kinda lost myself. I have been fighting to come back for the last two. I'm finally seeing positive changes, and it's nice to be back. It's weird to me how this even happens. I guess since I spent so many years pregnant, and with a baby I got so caught up in the day to day taking care of everyone else but me. You would think it would be easy, but actually it's been hard to take time for myself everyday. My husband is adjusting to the change, and so are the kids.</div>
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Looking forward</div>
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As I reflect over my life, I realize being a stay at home mom has been the greatest blessing. I wouldn't want it any other way. I have enjoyed seeing each of my children grow up. There is no way I could be less of a mom, or not here for the twins like I was the other 5. It's actually bittersweet, part of me is glad to be done with each stage as it passes, and the other part of me can't believe this stage of having children is coming to an end. I'm excited and scared all at the same time when I think about how different even the next 3 years will be. I will have 3 grown children, and all of my kids will be in school. I'm making small changes everyday, so the family won't go into shock and wonder what is going in with me! All I know is the frumpy housewife days are done!! :)</div>
</span>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08837162911344469993noreply@blogger.com2